Posted on September 20, 2020
Given how stressful I was finding the pandemic and the lockdown, I thought it might be helpful to keep a list of what I’d done (achieved, managed, spent time on – whichever word is most appropriate), whether it took a huge amount of effort or was simply something I’d wanted to do, just to remind myself that I was still doing things, that I was still capable of being productive during such a difficult time. Some of them are silly, some of them important, and some of them are just interesting. And I thought posting it would be a good record of sorts when it comes to looking back at this time.
I don’t consider us to be out of lockdown by posting this. It’s just that now I’m starting a new year at university – the second of my Masters Degree – so my life is going to change. I’m doing all of my classes online, rather than going in for half of the classes as is the current norm at uni; I’d be commuting and the risks still feel too high for just two hours a week. So in terms of leaving the house, not much is changing. But it’s a moment of transition in my life and so it seemed like a natural stopping point for this post. I may continue it as a series, depending on how things play out going forward but for now, this is what I did while in lockdown, from 13th March to 20th September 2020…
Films: Hot Fuzz, The Martian, Miss Congeniality, etc.
TV Shows: Episodes, Lucifer, and Nikita, etc.
This is something I did a lot of as a teenager but reverted to during my Masters as a form of stress relief: escaping into another world, a familiar and safe world. My most impressive achievements were reading all of the Ros Myers (Spooks) Fanfiction I could find and reading The Changeling and it’s three sequels (a Harry Potter alternate universe where Ginny is sorted into Slytherin, which totals nearly 600,000 words). Of course, there were more one off stories; these are just my greatest hits.
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I doubt I’ll ever be able to look back on this time positively (from a personal perspective – in the wider sense, it’s clearly been catastrophic) but there have been moments and experiences that I am grateful to have had. As I’ve said, I don’t consider lockdown to be over so this post may become a series but with my Masters to focus on, I will have significantly less time to dedicate to bigger projects like organising my photos or sorting through my possessions. So lockdown continues; I’m just entering the next chapter.
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Posted on June 13, 2020
I think probably most of us can say that we are struggling mentally in lockdown. I certainly am. I seem to be swinging wildly between overwhelmed, depressed, and anxious with no warning as to when the ground I’m standing on is going to change. It’s exhausting and kind of makes me feel sick all of the time. So I’ve put together a short list of things that are, if not helping, then managing my mental health in this emotionally turbulent time.
It’s also worth mentioning that I have an anti-anxiety medication that I take as needed, which is pretty much all the time right now. My psychiatrist is aware of this and supports it. This has been hugely helpful and has halted many a panic spiral for which I’m really grateful. Being constantly overwhelmed by anxiety is exhausting and only makes it harder to cope with everything going on.
As I said, I don’t know if these things are helping or just maintaining my mental state but honestly, I think the only thing that’s really going to help my mental health is life returning to somewhat normal: being able to continue our lives and do the things we love to do without a thick fear of being infected. I want to feel safe again. I want to hug people, go back to university, go back to the gym. Maybe I’ll write a post about all the things I want to do when it’s safe again.
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Hi! I’m Lauren Alex Hooper. Welcome to my little blog! I write about living with Autism Spectrum Disorder, as well as several mental health issues. I’m a singersongwriter (and currently studying for a Masters in songwriting) so I’ll probably write a bit about that too.
My first single, ‘Invisible,’ is now available on iTunes and Spotify, with all proceeds going to Young Minds.
I’m currently releasing my first EP, Honest, track by track and the first three songs are available on all major platforms.