NOTE: Somehow, between the last WordPress update and my brain fog, this post got lost. It falls between the two posts, ‘The Application‘ and ‘It’s A Match,’ and I’ll include links in both of those so that – hopefully – everyone is able to follow the chronology of posts despite my mistake. Sorry!

Here is the next part of my Autism Dogs journey! Having been accepted onto the programme, I went up to visit the Autism Dogs farm in April 2024 to work on my Advanced Task List and meet some of the dogs…

I’d set an alarm (multiple alarms) since it was such an early start but I was actually woken up by Izzy as she snuggled close to my face, wrapping herself around my neck. It was very cute and I enjoyed the extra time cuddling with her before I had to get up. As much as I would’ve liked to have stayed there all morning, I had trains to get and dogs to visit so I eventually (reluctantly) got up and had a shower. Izzy seemed to know that me and Mum were going out because she stuck close to me as I got ready, as I did my make up and packed my bag. She’s just beyond adorable, which just makes it so hard to leave; it was so early and I was already keen to curl up for a nap and her super-snuggly behaviour really wasn’t motivating me to get up and go. But I had one last snuggle and then my Mum and I were out the door.

The journey to the Autism Dogs farm wasn’t the most relaxing of my life: the train to London was fine but then our connection to Stoke-on-Trent was cancelled and our only option was to get the next train, which meant we were going to miss our final train and be late for our session. I’m relatively used to the chaos and generally, it doesn’t faze me, but I do find it draining to repeatedly reshuffle my plans to find the best outcome. It certainly wasn’t what I needed on an already long day. We made it to Stoke-on-Trent and then had to get a cab to the farm instead of catching the final train. It’s only a short ride but they don’t come very often. The cab was painfully expensive but we managed to get there just about on time for our session. I was amazed.

The biggest part of the session was to build my Advanced Task List. As far as I’m aware, when the dogs are trained, they all go through the same basic skills training, like recall and sit and heel etc. That’s the first part of their training. On my side of things, once I was accepted onto the programme, I filled out lots of forms and had multiple calls with different people and learned about the process before travelling to the Autism Dogs farm to meet with several staff members to discuss the Advanced Task List. This involved looking at my various difficulties and how my assistance dog will hopefully be able to help me, which tasks she will perform in response to which behaviours. Once this list is compiled, the team created a profile of my needs to compare against the dogs in training; obviously, the idea is that the two profiles match, that you and your dog are compatible. For example, my meltdowns are often very loud – I’ll shout and scream and cry – and so I’d need a dog that is confident around loud noise. Everyone is going to have different needs and therefore need a different dog; you want to end up with the dog that’s the best fit for you so that the relationship is as successful as possible because, hopefully, you’re going to be working with this dog every day for a very long time. 

The Advanced Task List is made up of three to eight taught behaviours: less than three and the dog becomes illegible as an assistance dog (it’s not uncommon for a dog to ‘lose’ one of their skills if it’s no longer needed or used) but more than eight and the dog can get confused and struggle with the amount of commands and tasks. So we spent most of the session discussing the things I struggle with. As I’ve already mentioned, I have meltdowns and we discussed those; we also talked about shutdowns and I described them as best I could; we talked about sleep and anxiety and self-injurious behaviours; we talked about the dog being trained to perform deep pressure therapy and so on. We talked about all of this for over an hour, in as much detail as possible; they were really lovely and took things really gently, acutely aware that people can find it really difficult to talk about this stuff. But to be honest, I’ve talked about a lot of my difficulties and even some of my most distressing experiences quite a lot: online, on my blog, to friends and family, in therapy… even at conferences. So, on the whole, talking about it doesn’t really faze me (although there are, as I think there are for everyone, some areas that are really hard to dig into) and I could answer pretty much every question they had for me, with help from my Mum when I needed a prompt or an outside perspective was useful. The more information they had, the easier it would be to build a profile of me and the more accurate it would be. It was almost funny, how carefully they were handling the discussions (with me personally, I mean – I think it’s great that they’re so aware of the potential needs of the autistic person they’re working with), because I just wanted to talk about the dogs. I’m fascinated by the process and the training and so I was just sitting there, like, ‘Okay, can we stop talking about me now? Can we talk about the dogs?’ It’s just so interesting and I could listen to them talk about it for hours. 

Then came the part that was I was really excited about. I got to meet four different dogs (none of which would ultimately be mine), in order to get a sense of what breed and characteristics might be right for me, what size and texture of fur would be most manageable and comfortable. Having had and spent time with multiple breeds of dog throughout might life, I already had a sense of some of these things.

The first dog I met was a Cockapoo called Buddy. He was very sweet and very excitable (they were all ver excitable actually, given that it was dinner time for them) but I knew that I would struggle on a sensory level with the curly fur. He was lovely but his breed wasn’t one I’d be able to handle longterm on a sensory standpoint. The other three were different Labradors. I grew up with a Labrador so I’m very comfortable around them and just adore them. All three were gorgeous, two black – like the one I grew up with – and one yellow with more wiry fur. The first of the two black Labradors was a girl called Shadow who was so excitable and enthusiastic, sliding all over the tiled floor and slamming into me. She licked my face and then ran in circles around me before bounding over to meet Mum and the whole experience was just really adorable. The second black Labrador was a male called Denzel. He was also deeply enthusiastic but not quite as chaotic as Shadow had been; he definitely had more control over his limbs. But he still came charging over to meet me and licked my face over and over before trying to curl up in my lap even though he was much too big. And finally, I met the fourth dog, a wiry, yellow Labrador called Hero. He was a lot more chilled out because he’d already had his dinner – unlike the other three – so, while he trotted in and came straight over to me to check me out, he wasn’t like one of those super balls ricocheting off the walls. Instead, he snuffled my face and then leaned against me, heavier and heavier until I slid over onto the floor; when I pushed myself up, he just stood beside me in prime position so that I could stroke him (and keep stroking him). He was more chill than the previous three but he had had his dinner and I think he was a bit older; their dogs are usually between one and two years old and I think he was on the older side.

Buddy (top left), Shadow (top right), Denzel (bottom left), and Hero (bottom right).

I was definitely a fan of all three Labradors so, as a breed, they seemed like a clear choice. After Hero left, my Mum and I stayed for a bit longer and talked with the staff about various preferences, like size, and coat, etc. All of these things obviously need to be considered when, all being well, you’re going to be spending a lot of time with this dog, relying them; you need to feel comfortable with them and you definitely need to feel comfortable with them when you’re feeling under stress or overwhelmed or triggered.

So it felt like a very productive session. We wrapped things up and then my Mum and I headed for the station. I was absolutely exhausted by the day and fell asleep on two of the three trains, so deeply that my hands – which I’d apparently been using as a pillow – had gone numb. When we finally got home, Izzy was momentarily unimpressed by all of the different dog smells on our clothes but quickly dismissed them in her absolute delight that we’d returned to her. Even with my train naps, I was so tired that I went to bed early, snuggled up with Izzy.

It was exciting to move to the next step in this process. I was near the top of the list because I had been waiting for quite a long time by that point. But while it is a list of priority, they also weren’t going to just match me with the first dog available because we wouldn’t necessarily be a good match. That’s fine with me. As I said, I would rather wait a bit longer and find the best possible match. It also gives me a bit more time to mentally prepare: it’s a really big change and I really struggle with change. I have some really great support and I know that, once we all adjust and I have this new form of support in my life, things will hopefully get better – less erratic and unstable, emotionally – but anticipating this big change is stressful. So my feelings are very big and messy but I just have to keep reminding myself that lots of people have benefited from this process so far and that helps me to feel less anxious and more excited.