Posted on November 2, 2019
I’m very late in letting you guys know but my new single, ‘Bad Night,’ is now available to buy/stream/listen to in whatever format you listen to music to!


laurenalexhooper: AND IT’S OUT! ‘BAD NIGHT’ IS FINALLY OUT!
I’ve been waiting to release this song for so long that it’s oddly surreal to have it out in the world. I wrote it, with the help of @richardmarcmusic, after a particularly difficult night where I just felt completely overwhelmed by my depression. I felt like it was never going to get better. So I do what I always do and wrote a song about it. And eventually it turned into this. Even though it’s a difficult song, I hope you like it and I hope it makes you feel something.
Please, please, please buy/stream it. It would mean the world to me and all the wonderful people who’ve worked on it. You can find it here.
I’m truly sorry that it’s taken me so long to update you guys. After the whole process of ‘Invisible,’ I (and my writing/releasing/everything musical partner) decided to release the song independently and I found all of the aspects of that very stressful. So getting the song out was a mission in itself and then there were the decisions about what social media boosting to employ and it all just took every ounce of everything I had. By the end of that week, I was completely exhausted. And let’s not forget we were both just starting our Masters Degrees.
And then, to make things worse, I had possibly the worst Autism/mental health week of my life (just so you know, I sometimes combine them because I find them hard to extricate, not because I don’t know that they’re not the same thing). As I mentioned in my previous post, I’ve been having A LOT of meltdowns. It had come down to a couple a week but then I had week where I had multiple a day and it was just hideous. I’ll write more about it (hopefully) and meltdowns in general in the future but that put ‘Bad Night’ the furthest from my mind for a moment.
It’s hard to believe that it’s only been about two weeks since the song came out. It feels like a lifetime. But having said that, the journey is far from over. There is a lot of content still to come. A spoiler for you special people: keep an eye on my socials over the next couple of days. Something is coming… Okay, that sounds a lot creepier than it is.
I promise this blog won’t become simply an avenue for me to talk about my music (although much of my music is inspired by my mental health and so does have some relevance). It is just a massive part of my life right now, taking up a lot of my time and focus, as is my Masters, which is also all about music. I’m trying to find a balance but I’m struggling since my mental health has been so bad. I’m barely (and sometimes not) getting done what I need to be getting done so it’s all very chaotic and emotional and difficult right now. Just know that I’m trying my best. I’ll get there, I promise.
Category: emotions, event, mental health, music, university Tagged: anxiety, autism, autistic meltdown, autistic meltdowns, bad night, honest, honest ep, meltdown, meltdowns, mental illness, my music, new music, new music uk, new single, single release
Posted on August 10, 2019
Autism is not always the easiest thing to understand. That’s okay. I’m autistic and I don’t always understand it. And that’s why words are wonderful: because they can help us make sense of things we don’t understand. The right words can show you a whole new side of something. That’s why I write this blog.
But for now, I thought I’d have a look at some of the most common analogies for Autism:
Possibly the most common analogy is the comparison of computer operating systems. Being autistic is being a Mac in a world of PCs. Ultimately they do the same thing but there are real differences that put them apart. Not all of the software is compatible, which causes problems when interfacing; you have to learn both to communicate smoothly. Functions require different commands on the keyboard or are found in different menus. To a PC, a Mac is weird and other but it’s just a different operating system. It’s also worth pointing out that the metaphor extends in that both PC and Mac can get viruses as both neurotypical and autistics can have mental illnesses. Mental illness and Autism are not synonymous and it’s important that that is always made clear.
Another analogy I’ve recently come across is being a cat in a room full of dogs. In an attempt to fit in, you try and join in, playing and running after sticks. But none of these things feel natural and in reality, you’d rather do your own thing (or sleep). And you only want attention on your terms. You are obviously not a dog, but that doesn’t mean you can’t get on with dogs; it just takes a bit of patience.
A good analogy for day-to-day life as an autistic person is the coke can analogy. Throughout the day, each task, each thing that requires concentration and energy, shakes the coke can a little. Over the day, that builds and builds until you’re just trying to keep it from exploding, at least until you get home. Sometimes you can release the fizz slowly but sometimes it’s all too much and the can explodes, resulting in a meltdown.
So far these are all I’ve found that make sense to me although I’m sure there are more out there. How do you explain or describe Autism? Do you use variations of these ones or do you have entirely different ones?
Category: autism Tagged: analogy, asd, autism, autism analogies, autism analogy, autism spectrum disorder, describing, describing autism, metaphor, metaphors
Posted on July 13, 2019
Hi guys.
I’m sorry for my extended absence. I never meant to abandon the blog; it’s just been a really, really tough month. I’ve been taking the new medication (or old medication – Phenelzine), which seems to have had no effect other than to upset my stomach. But I’m trying not to give up hope just yet. One of my cats had kittens, which has been incredibly stressful. My depression has reached new lows and I actually started to find it difficult to think at all: sentences would not finish in my brain. It was frustrating and very distressing. I’ve also had quite possibly more meltdowns in the last month than I have had in the previous six. So it’s been hard and writing has just felt impossible. I couldn’t put what I was feeling into words and I didn’t feel like I had anything useful to say, anything anyone wanted to hear.
I don’t quite know what happens now. I love this blog dearly so I have no intention of abandoning it but you may have to be gentle with me as I try to get back to writing. I’m doing my best, I promise.
Category: about me, medication, mental health, treatment Tagged: asd, autism, autism spectrum disorder, blogging, depression, meltdown, meltdowns, mental health blog, mental health blogger, phenelzine, writing

Hi! I’m Lauren Alex Hooper. Welcome to my little blog! I write about living with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), ADHD (Inattentive Type), and Hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (hEDS), as well as several mental health issues.
I’m a singer-songwriter (it’s my biggest special interest and I have both a BA and MA in songwriting) so I’ll probably write a bit about that too.
My first single, ‘Invisible,’ is on all platforms, with all proceeds going to Young Minds.
My debut EP, Honest, is available on all platforms, with a limited physical run at Resident Music in Brighton.
I’m currently working on an album about my experiences as an autistic woman.
Hi! I’m Lauren Alex Hooper. Welcome to my little blog! I write about living with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), ADHD (Inattentive Type), and Hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (hEDS), as well as several mental health issues.
I’m a singer-songwriter (it’s my biggest special interest and I have both a BA and MA in songwriting) so I’ll probably write a bit about that too.
My first single, ‘Invisible,’ is on all platforms, with all proceeds going to Young Minds.
My debut EP, Honest, is available on all platforms, with a limited physical run at Resident Music in Brighton.
I’m currently working on an album about my experiences as an autistic woman.
Finding Hope